Simple Times by Amy Sedaris

 Book is suitable for adults only.

Have you ever picked up a book, that wasn't a comic or joke book and just started cracking up?  This happen to me when I picked up, Simple Times: crafts for poor people by Amy Sedaris.  I'm usually not a flap reader of  dust jackets nor do I read the back of the book to find out what the book is about.  I judge a book by its cover and that is how I decide to throw down some cold cash to purchase a book unless someone recommended the book, gave me the book or sent me one to review.  


Why is this important? It isn't unless you read the flap on the dust jacket of the book.  That is where my laughter began.  Right away I knew this simple times craft book would be more than just crafts.  It is full of light sarcasm, witty, off color humor that can take something simple, like the dust jacket of a book and give you instructions on how to make it into a hat!

Here are a few of the chapters and ideas:

• The Whos and Whats of Crafting- Did you know that Tuna Can Lid baby's sleep chime is the number one craft?  Who is crafting? According to the book "More than 8 our of 10 households have at least 4 out of 5 family members engaging in 2 out of 3 crafts 78% of the time.  A staggering 98% of this group are homosexual men."  No I did not know these facts!
• Craft yourself homely- Did you know that old hairnets make terrific spiderwebs??
• Nature's Way- Gather acorns and other nuts and make a nut wreath, nut people and nut community! How about gluing some shells on a bathing suit? 
• The Joy of Poverty- Never thought of this one? Make a Mouse Ghetto for the little creature. It will be get tired of the the living conditions and move out.
• Hurdles- This section gives crafters who are experiences difficulties some crafts specifically for them.  There are crafts for those suffering with ADD, Chronic Pain, Hard of Hearing, Anger, Depression, Elderly,etc. Very insightful!
• Safety Meeting- I think this should have been the first chapter.
• Crafts for those "At Rest"- I loved the Mexican Sugar Skull recipe! 
• ConfectionERIES- Love this chapter! Full of yummy crafts you make to eat.
• Crafting for Jesus- Awesome! It gave me a retro toss back into the late 70s of making Matchstick crosses! You have to burn off 200 matches first! 
• Unreturnable Gift Giving- How about that Seat Shield that you made for your nudist friend? You know the one that is a doily or a decorated piece of washable fabric so the nudist can use it to sit on furniture when visiting family and friends

My Final Take:  Really I could go on and on but then what would you have to read?  Get this book! It is a total crack up.  Again, though, it in my opinion, it is for adults only. Some of the pictures are for adult eyes only. There isn't nudity but a few pictures and crafts are not crafts that kids need to make.  Christmas is coming! Get it for your girlfriend and then sit around with a bottle of wine and crack up! 
FROM HACHETTE:
SIMPLE TIMES: Crafts for Poor People
By Amy Sedaris

America's most delightfully unconventional hostess and the bestselling author of I Like You delivers a new book that will forever change the world of crafting. According to Amy Sedaris, it's often been said that ugly people craft and attractive people have sex. In her new book, SIMPLE TIMES, she sets the record straight. Demonstrating that crafting is one of life's more pleasurable and constructive leisure activities, Sedaris shows that anyone with a couple of hours to kill and access to pipe cleaners can join the elite society of crafters. 

You will discover how to make popular crafts, such as: crab-claw roach clips, tinfoil balls, and crepe-paper moccasins, and learn how to: get inspired (Spend time at a Renaissance Fair; Buy fruit, let it get old, and see what shapes it turns into); remember which kind of glue to use with which material (Tacky with Furry, Gummy with Gritty, Paste with Prickly, and always Gloppy with Sandy); create your own craft room and avoid the most common crafting accidents (sawdust fires, feather asphyxia, pine cone lodged in throat); and cook your own edible crafts, from a Crafty Candle Salad to Sugar Skulls, and many more recipes.

PLUS whole chapters full of more crafting ideas (Pompom Ringworms! Seashell Toilet Seat Covers!) that will inspire you to create your own hastily constructed obscure d'arts; and much, much more!

Thanks to Hachette Book Group for providing this review copy.  All opinions expressed are my own and you should get the book and form your own.   I found out about this opportunity via The Product Review Place.